Tuesday, November 18, 2008

I Still Believe...

It has been a hard couple of weeks for me! I always debate in my mind what to "share" in cyber world but the people that love me read this and know my struggles anyway so why not share things on my blog knowing that you all pray for me. (if you don't pray for me please start! :))

Today at the college I received some difficult news. One of my beloved collegues, Bill Merrill, died of a massive heart attack last night. I just spoke with him yesterday afternoon and we shared some laughs together. He leaves a wife and two young children. He was our VP of Development. An amazingly brillant man who LOVED TMC. He was doing amazing things here and I loved working with him.

Today I am reminded as I have EVERY DAY the last couple months that God is soverign in control of ALL things and that He is good. This is a profound loss for many people here at the college and my heart is sad. Yet, I can say I Believe that God is in control and knows what is best. He has a plan that is for our benefit! "Trust in Him at ALL TIMES you people, pour out your heart before Him, God is a refuge for us." Psalm 62:8

Through all the sadness and trials over the last few weeks, the Lord has been refining me and has given me a peace that surpasses my undersanding. He has gifted me with JOY and with my sadness there remains gladness! My pastor has been talking about joyful suffering. It has really impacted the way I have been thinking and I'm realizing that it is a battle of the mind. It's a discipline.

*Pain and the way we respond to it reflects who we are.
*Your mind drives who you are (Provers 23:7) (Phil 4:8)
*Your success in trials depends on how much you feed and renew your mind with the Word.

Ecc. 7:3 says "Sorrow is better than laughter for by a sad countenace the heart is made better." This has been true of me! No matter what the circumstances or the trails that God allows into my life...even though I don't understand God is Good. I know that He is working and I choose to trust in him and renew my mind with things that He has promised me.

Please pray for Bill's wife Holly and their two young children during this time.

Hebrews 12:2 "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."

3 comments:

Andrea said...

You are a love - truly a love! Sorry I couldn't see you at Jen's last night but we MUST have dinner soon - our hearts are dealing with so many similar things and I want to love on little Hollie very much. I pray for you often as we walk similar roads my friend. Hugs to you - big big hugs! xoxo

Anonymous said...

You are such a great example to me, Hollie! Love you and praying for you!

Cherie Baker Vann said...

Hollie, so sorry to hear this - I do pray for you :) and will continue to! I've been in your shoes and am so very excited to see all that God does in your life!!